


gambit: fastball special

by 90kg_anvil



Series: 3H Kinkmeme Fills [7]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Divine Pulse (Fire Emblem), Fluff and Humor, Gen, Minor Injuries, there are recruited students too, very lighthearted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:07:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29408850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/90kg_anvil/pseuds/90kg_anvil
Summary: Originally written for and posted on the 3H Kinkmeme."Dimitri," Byleth says one day when they brought the Lions to train in a field.He looks up, smiling politely. "Yes, Professor?""I want to try a new tactic with you."Dimitri yeets his classmates. Prompt in author notes.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & My Unit | Byleth, My Unit | Byleth & Sothis
Series: 3H Kinkmeme Fills [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2148606
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	gambit: fastball special

**Author's Note:**

> ...dimYEETri
> 
> disclaimer not to do anything i described in this fic because i completely made it up, and theres nongraphic mentions of light injuries and divine pulse usage, but other than that? no real content warnings. enjoy!
> 
> Prompt:
> 
> Byleth starts the trend bc who else would be wild enough to think it up (and have a useful redo power just in case theyre about to go splat on the ground). Felix of course follows, "Boar, do me!"
> 
> Dimitri can go thru the whole Blue Lions or maybe just a select few. Pls do include recruits from the other houses too!!

Dimitri is strong. Terrifyingly strong. Byleth thought they'd seen just about every kind of fighter growing up, but they'd never met anyone who could snap a steel lance with his bare hands. Casually. Because he _wasn't_ paying attention. And if the conversation Byleth overheard him having with Raphael isn't boasting, he can lift and throw boulders like a living, breathing, overly formal catapult.

Byleth likes to think of themself as pragmatic, the way their father raised them to be, but truth be told, they've always been curious.

"Dimitri," Byleth says one day when they brought the Lions to train in a field.

He looks up, smiling politely. "Yes, Professor?"

"I want to try a new tactic with you."

"Of course," he says as he walks over. "What weapon?"

"I want you to throw me."

Sothis manifests directly in Byleth's field of vision, makes deliberate eye contact, and facepalms.

Dimitri blinks a few times. "Throw you?"

"Yep."

"Of course I can try for you, Professor, but are you sure this is safe?"

Byleth shrugs. "Hasn't stopped me yet."

Dimitri looks like he wants to protest, but he simply nods. "How should we proceed?"

Byleth considers. There's a few options for being thrown, each with its own drawbacks:

1) Like a catapult. Dimitri would reach behind his back, grip Byleth by the shoulders, and fling them as far as he could, likely flipping them in the process. It would be very hard to control the landing.

2) Like a ball. Byleth would compact themself as much as possible, and Dimitri would simply throw them one-handed. That being said, Byleth themself might be too unwieldy.

3) Like a discus. Byleth would fold themself up so that Dimitri can grab them by the hands or feet, whichever was more easily accessible, spin around enough to build up momentum, and throw them when ready. The most pressing concern would likely be Dimitri's ability to aim.

4) Like a trampoline. By far the simplest option, Dimitri would simply interlace his fingers, kneel, and launch Byleth as they make a running jump. The only drawback is that this option is extremely boring.

"So, shall we go in order?" Byleth asks.

"Sure," Dimitri says, looking not at all ready.

Catapult is a disaster. Byleth has to use Divine Pulse twice and drink a vulnerary.

Ball is unwieldy as expected. If Dimitri were the size of a Golem and able to hold Byleth in a single hand, maybe it would have worked consistently. The single time he manages to successfully launch them is extremely good and precisely what Byleth was looking for, but all in all they got dropped on their ass too many times to stick with the method.

(Various students yell "Yeet!" in their general direction. It's been an increasingly popular battle cry during handaxe throwing practice, so Byleth isn't too surprised that it resurfaces here.)

Discus might one day be promising if Dimitri keeps at it and practices aiming, but today? Byleth would prefer not to narrowly miss getting thrown into a tree again.

(By this point, the rest of the Blue Lions have stopped practicing and are standing around watching.)

Trampoline is reliable, as expected, but more importantly, it's _fun_.

Byleth feels almost like a fabled hero making a great leap across a chasm to end the battle with the monster once and for all.

They land with catlike grace every time.

"Is this how the tactic should be done?" Dimitri asks as they walk back over.

Byleth nods and pats him on the head. "Yep. Good job."

Dimitri beams.

"So it's safe?" Felix demands.

Byleth nods.

Felix nods back, then turns to face Dimitri. "Boar, do me!"

Byleth elects not to make the obvious inappropriate joke.

"As you wish," Dimitri says, and kneels back down again, at the ready.

Felix takes a long running start and yells as he springs off of Dimitri's hands, twisting midair to draw his sword and take a mighty swing as he hits the ground. Visually, it's one of the more impressive combat maneuvers Byleth has seen.

He's definitely practiced this.

Sylvain laughs. "Looks like all those summers spent heroically jumping into lakes paid off, huh?"

"Shut up," Felix snaps, sheathing his sword.

"Me next," Caspar grins. "I'm gonna do a barrel roll! Yeet!"

Byleth grimaces and readies a Divine Pulse, but Caspar actually manages to pull it off with only mild bruises and scrapes after sliding into a landing. Linhardt sarcastically claps before sending a Heal his way.

Leonie cracks her knuckles, rolls her neck, and bounces in place. "You still good to throw us, Dimitri?"

"I am."

"All right! Let's do this."

She doesn't go as high or as far as the other two, but she safely rolls into the landing and springs up into a battle stance. Byleth is impressed. She's really been taking her brawling lessons to heart.

"Hmm," Yuri says, leaning on Byleth's shoulder after appearing from nowhere. "New tactic?"

Byleth nods.

"Awesome!" Balthus declares. "I gotta try this."

Hapi hums contemplatively. "Aren't you a bit heavy, Baltie?"

Balthus's protests are drowned out by the loud cheer Caspar gives as he goes again.

"Hey!" Byleth says after he gets up safely, "let everyone else have a turn."

A line has started to form, and Annette is at the front of it. "Ready?"

Dimitri hasn't even broken a sweat. "Ready."

Annette actually misses the jump the first time, to her bewilderment. The second time, she trips over Dimitri instead. The third time, however, is the charm.

With a loud "YEET!" Annette twists around midair and casts Wind behind her, which has the two important effects of knocking Dimitri and Byleth to the ground and making her fly much higher and farther than anyone else.

Somehow, miraculously, she emerges unscathed.

"No more magic boosts," Byleth announces the second they're sure Annette is all right.

Constance crosses her arms with a quiet "If you insist."

"I'm still fine to continue yeeting," Dimitri says, completely straight-faced, ripped-up grass in his hair as he gets back into position. "It takes far more than that to incapacitate me."

Dedue sighs.

"I'm glad," Dorothea says, then makes a run for it.

When she leaps, she does a graceful split in midair, toes pointed and back arched as she extends her arms like wings, and Byleth wishes they could make the clouds part to put a spotlight on her. She lands flawlessly and takes a bow.

Balthus is up next, and he lets out an excited whoop the second he's midair. Byleth knew that Dimitri was strong, but seeing him launch Balthus with the same ease as someone much smaller is still somehow surprising.

Regardless, Byleth has to use a Divine Pulse. That man truly has abysmal luck.

Almost as if he were cursed by some divine power.

"Hey," Sothis protests, "don't blame me for that. I was asleep for most of his life!"

And she could fix it now.

"Hmph."

Sylvain squints from where he's standing next in line. "You in position, Your Highness?"

"I --- yes?"

Dimitri, who is less than ten meters from Sylvain, has not moved whatsoever, and Byleth is _this_ close to dragging Sylvain to the nearest optometrist.

"Okay, just making sure. Yeet!"

There are no fancy flourishes or combat moves, but he sticks the landing competently. This is noteworthy in that it's the polar opposite of how he usually acts in practice, and he seems to realize this, because he makes sure to bow extravagantly and brag about beginner's luck on the way back.

Ingrid rolls her eyes. "Ready when you are, Your Highness!"

"I am ready as well."

Ingrid keeps her head extremely level and tries to balance herself midair, and her landing is a classic emergency dismount. Her pegasus knight training must really be paying off.

"Prepare yourself!" is the only warning Dimitri gets before Constance runs at him full tilt. The jump is botched when Constance's heel gets stuck between the grooves of Dimitri's gauntlet and she lands flat on her face in the grass.

She only gets the wind knocked out of her, and she's not even particularly upset, but Dimitri still apologizes like he accidentally destroyed all of her research.

"Your Highness," Ashe interrupts, "may I?"

Dimitri stops apologizing mid-sentence to smile politely and get back into position. "Of course."

Ashe must be even lighter than Byleth thought, because he gets vaulted pretty high into the air before rolling into a landing. He's back on his feet faster than any of the rest.

It's a type of damage control that is only ever learned by fighting for your life. Byleth tries not to think about Ashe's past as a thief.

"Yeet," he whispers, relatively proud of himself.

Actually, wait a minute.

"Hilda! Linhardt! This is class time, not nap time! Get up! C'mon! We're doing a training exercise!"

They both grumble as they get up and join the rest of the class.

Byleth turns to Raphael, who's next up in line. "Sorry, but these two are going first."

"All right!"

"Hilda, you're up."

She bats her eyes, undoubtedly to say she's a delicate maiden with a weak constitution and fragile bones, but Byleth isn't in the mood. "Complain and you have to do it with an axe."

Hilda huffs. "You're making me _work_."

After stepping out of line to recalculate her run-up distance, she does a series of perfectly-executed flips in midair and lands on her feet, arms raised above her head.

"Impressive," Byleth says with full honesty, "but since you complained, you'll have to do it again with an axe."

There is murder in Hilda's eyes as she walks back to retrieve her axe, but she actually does it again. This time, she only somersaults once and uses the momentum to full-body swing her axe so hard so hard it gets stuck in the ground, screaming "YEET!" loud enough to echo among the hills.

She and Balthus have to work together to get it out. Byleth attempts to calculate whether that move would do enough damage to one-shot a Demonic Beast.

"My turn, I presume?" Linhardt asks when the path is cleared.

Byleth nods.

Linhardt sighs but does it anyway. He seems to flail around a little midair, as if unsure of what to do, and lands hard on his hands and knees. Byleth heals him before he has the chance to see any blood.

"Hey, Dimitri!" Raphael yells.

"Yes?"

"I bet I can throw you."

Dimitri smiles politely. "Please do not hurt yourself on my account."

"Nonsense! I want you to have fun too."

Dimitri looks at Byleth for assistance. They raise an eyebrow. Kid's going to be a king in a few months, and obvious anxiety aside, he should be able to tell people _no_ by himself.

Dimitri turns back to face Raphael. "Only if the Professor teaches you the technique first. In the meantime, do you wish to jump?"

"Yeah, I do!"

Raphael hits the ground like a boulder, but he just gets up like it was nothing. Byleth wonders whether he would sustain any damage at all if he wore heavy armor, and if not, could he possibly be used as a battering ram?

Wait. No. This is getting ridiculous. They called this a "tactic" as an excuse to see whether Dimitri was strong enough to throw them like a sportsball. Byleth can't actually order their students to do this in _battle_.

...Unless?

"No, Yuri, feel free to go first," Mercedes says, smiling gently as always.

"But you've been waiting so patiently."

"Oh, if you insist. Are you feeling tired, Dimitri?"

"I am still fine, thank you. Ready when you are."

She giggles. "I suppose I'll say it too. Yeet!"

Mercedes hoists her skirts up and sprints with surprising ferocity. While most of the others aimed to go high, she launches herself much farther. On the landing, she deliberately overbalances to continue moving forward after making contact with the ground, which cannot be comfortable, but she easily dusts herself off.

For someone who's complained to Byleth about physical activity, Mercedes sure knows how to do a long jump.

"All right, let's do this," Yuri says, tying his hair out of his face. "Yeet."

He's frighteningly fast, which Byleth really should keep that in mind for future battles, but Dimitri is surprised by it and he fumbles the throw. Yuri somehow manages to right himself midair and land safely in a crouch.

"No hard feelings," he tells Dimitri before he can start profusely apologizing again. "Hapi calls me Yuribird for a reason."

Byleth is pretty sure this isn't the reason.

"I sure do," Hapi says. "Ready to yeet me, Didi?"

Dimitri blinks at the nickname but nods anyway. "I am."

Hapi has a very safe, very straightforward leap with a rolling landing that clearly did not leave any injuries. Byleth is extremely grateful for this.

"Dedue," Dimitri calls out, "I believe it is your turn."

He's the last one left.

Dedue politely shakes his head. "I am all right, Your Highness."

"Are you worried about getting hurt?"

"No. I am worried that I will injure you by mistake."

"Dedue---"

Byleth decides to intervene. "The both of you will be fine. I promise."

Dedue sends them a grateful look. "Are you ready, Your Highness?"

Dimitri smiles. "Of course."

Dedue carefully steps back a few meters, likely to give himself more time to build up speed, then sticks his arms out the second he's airborne as if for balance. Byleth doesn't expect it to work, but he lands safely on his feet.

Huh.

"Does anyone wish to go again?" Dimitri asks.

Multiple people respond in the affirmative.

Byleth lets them all keep jumping until it's nearly dinnertime.

"Hey wait a minute," Raphael says right as they've nearly packed up to leave, "Dimitri hasn't gotten a chance to get yeeted!"

Dimitri freezes. "Oh, that's quite all right! I am more than content with being the support for all of you."

"But do you want to?" Byleth asks.

He looks hopeful for a second before politely smiling and saying, "No, I couldn't possibly. It would impose too much on the class."

Byleth sighs. "Raphael, get over here. I'm gonna show you how to yeet with two people."

Sothis pops up for the first time in a while, hand resting on her chin as she looks at Byleth mockingly. "Oh, are you now?"

Yep. One way or another.

"Hm. Well. You have two Divine Pulses left, so don't waste them."

Duly noted.

"So, you saw how Dimitri had his fingers laced together?"

"Yeah."

"Squat across from me and lace your fingers with mine."

"Hands next to each other?"

"Yeah. Hold as steady as you can, and the second you feel him land, yank upward."

"That's it?"

Sothis huffs. "You're completely making this up!"

"You got it," Byleth replies to them both. They and Raphael get into position. "Dimitri, whenever you're ready!"

"Of course," he says, then takes a running start. "Yeet!"

Byleth and Raphael manage to get it right on the first try. Dimitri soars upward, albeit a lot lower than when he was throwing people, and he gasps at the apex of the jump, as if experiencing weightlessness for the first time.

...That's entirely possible, actually. Byleth hasn't put him on the flight rotation even once because for some reason the wyverns really don't trust him.

The landing isn't pretty. Dimitri skids forward on his knees and forearms, tearing into the dirt with his armor. At the very last moment, he loses his balance and collapses onto his side.

Byleth is in the middle of wondering where all their vulneraries went when Dimitri rolls onto his back and lets out a burst of surprised laughter.

"I --- oh, apologies---" and he lets Raphael pull him up from the ground, still chuckling. "Please do not worry. I am fine. I simply --- this was the most fun I've had in a very long time."

Balthus swears loudly and hands Yuri a coin.

"Can we do this again?" Caspar asks.

Byleth considers. "Show of hands, who would like to practice this technique in the future?"

Almost everybody's hand goes up.

Huh.

Byleth shrugs. "All right."

A few weeks later, Byleth's midterm evaluations are some of the highest in Garreg Mach's history. When Seteth asks them why, or how, the only thing Byleth can say is, "Yeet?"

**Author's Note:**

> finally de-anoning to post my kinkmeme fills here


End file.
